Edition 12
On my mind this week:
We’ve been having some tricky mornings at our place. Broken sleep coupled with a wonderful concoction of teething baby, sleeplessness and a 5 year old who leaps out of bed at 5am starving and ready to roll. When I was already dreaming of a second coffee while drinking my first I knew we needed a solution. Cue the one thing that always helps me – a solid gold track. It’s the same thing when I’m stuck creatively or generally slumping in a pool of lack lustre ideas, the perfect song really helps me figure something out or places me back inside myself.
After stumbling across the podcast Table Manners with Jesse Ware last week I have been deep diving into Jesse’s liquid vocals. Her track Remember Where You Are (which is ironically exactly what I needed this week) has quickly soared right up my most played tunes. To me her music feels a little bit disco and a lot like boozey nights out with pre drinks, blurry chats in nightclub bathrooms and dark, delicious dance floors. Whether you’re in lockdown still or just in a situation where home is where you are more than anywhere else, music can act like a portal to the marrow of your bones and the muscle memory of nights or adventures gone by. There are songs that take me to specific moments in time, or to general feelings of nostalgia or lift me right up and into my gym class or out on a long run. There are also songs that take you down into the depths of grief or loss that feel cathartic and like medicine. In no particular order here are a jumble of songs that I treasure, matched with specific life moments like a good wine list paired with the right food.
Living in London in the summer, drinking beers on Clapham Common and sharing a flat with a glorious troop of mates. London Still by The Waifs and London Mine & For a Minute by Joy Crookes
Driving to the beach with a pal, windows down, singing it out loud. Santa Monica by Everclear
Break Ups. Where Does the Good Go by Tegan and Sara
How it felt when I met James. Like coming home. First Day of My Life by Bright Lights
When I’m feeling overworked and need a good cry, a sit on the porch and a cup of tea. This Woman’s Work by Kate Bush
The start of a run or on the way to a gym class that has that real ‘I cannot be arsed’ kind of vibe. Suddenly I See by KT Tunstall
Cooking Dinner. Come Together by The Beatles (no idea why I like cooking to this song but the heart wants what it wants) this should definitely be accompanied by a wine and frying onions on a low heat. Actually this whole album is a good old 5pmsie time.
Parenthood. For when you need a reminder of just why it is you cleaned weet-bix off the floor for the thousandth time and put another load of washing in the machine. All Ways by Elliot Park, Had You To Teach Me by Teeny Tiny Stevies (the last verse of this makes me cry every time), Where you Lead by Albireo and Growing Up with Macklemore and Ryan Lewis with Ed Sheeran
Fatherhood - Father and Daughter by Paul Simon and Gracie by Ben Folds
Motherhood – The Mother by Brandi Carlile
Stillbirth and Miscarriage. This is the only song that I’ve heard that captures how it feels to love and lose someone you have never met. Winter Bear by Coby Grant
Meet Me in the Middle of the Air by Paul Kelly. When my Dad passed away our family listened to this song often. I think it’s for when putting words around the death of your person is too much to bare and what your heart needs to hear is I’ll meet you in the middle of the air rather than good bye.
Something to cook:
Tess' Lemon Impossible Pie
A reminder that even when life feels impossible you can take lemons and make lemon impossible pie.
Ingredients:
4 eggs (whisked)
3/4 cup sugar
1/4 cup margarine
1 tsp vanilla essence
1/4 salt
1/2 cup lemon juice
1/2 cup orange juice
1 cup coconut
1 1/2 cups milk
1/2 cup s/r flour
1/2 tps baking powder
Rind of one lemon and one orange
Method:
Place all the above said ingredients in a big mixing bowl and stir until combined.
Bake in a 180 degree Celsius oven in a pie dish for approx. 25 minutes until the top is set. Impossibly you end up with 3 layers, pastry on the bottom, custard in the middle and coconut on top.
Spoon into a lovely bowl with vanilla ice cream and eat slowly with an element of smugness for how easily you made the impossible possible.
Just a short one today. The days are getting colder here and the sun is going down early. I'm writing this week's letter from my kitchen table covered with crayon pictures of giant headed stick people and lanky dinosaurs, a box of weet-bix, a baby monitor and one sad looking milk rusk. It's Friday night and I've decided to give up on the endless tidying up for today, write to you and then sign off for the night. We made it to the weekend and what a relief it is.
Lots of love to wherever you are and however this weekend finds you.
Tonts x
I would like to acknowledge the Traditional Owners of the land on which I write today, the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation, and pay my respect to their Elders past, present and emerging.